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This
past week we had the pleasure of a visit from my sister-in-law and her two
oldest sons. On Wednesday, my
husband took the day off work and we all went on a float trip down the
Delaware River
. At one point, nearing the
end of our float, I was talking with my younger nephew, who is nine years
old, and he sweetly asked "what’s it like to be a grown-up?"
He seemed to ask not only out of curiosity, but also out of a keen
social sense that this was a subject I could get into---kind of like when
you meet someone at a cocktail party for the first time and you’re
looking for a topic to launch the conversation and you thoughtfully
inquire "how do you like living in Westchester?" We chatted for
a little while about being able to make your own choices in life, but also
having more responsibility, and how it was important to act like a kid
every now and then, no matter how old you are.
In the few days since that delightfully simple but profound
conversation, I thought more about what being a grown-up means to me, and
I realize that many of my childhood images of adulthood have, in fact,
come true. The best way I can
sum this up is by relating a seemingly trivial incident.
As a kid, I was hardly deprived of recreation, but our family
vacations always took the form of road trips.
"When I grow up," I thought, "I’m going to travel
by plane." Fortunately, I married someone who likes to travel as much
as I do, and we have been to many places around the world, individually
and together, for business and pleasure.
But it was on a simple trip to visit family in
California
that I was struck with a sense of peace and recognition.
I turned to my husband who was sitting next to me on the plane and
smiled, "this is going to sound crazy, but this scene is exactly how
I pictured my grown-up life when I was a kid."
I’m not sure if my husband, who flew a lot as a child and never
got to go on road trips, fully understood, but this very simple situation
made me feel like I was doing exactly what I wanted.
I’ve had this sensation at other times as well, but in each case,
it revolves around something seemingly simple, like cooking a meal in our
home kitchen, or renting my first real apartment with my best friend.
But too often I become focused on what I don’t have and it’s
easy to overlook that which I have successfully manifested in my life.
Childhood goals are pure spirit, unencumbered by duties or
restrictions, and each time we realize that we are plucking the fruit of
an idea that we planted a long time ago, we are in touch with who we
really are.
Karen
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